2016, The Year of #ItsComplicated




2016 was probably the greatest year of my life, yet. And it was also one of the toughest. Reality as we once knew it is being turned on its head and I am truly excited.

This year alone I noticed the life experiences of millions of young Millenial females seem to be freakishly in sync. I  would experience a personal strife, or, epiphany and I would hear the exact same story, recounted from other young women in Johannesburg and around the world at the exact same moment. Time and again. I mean articles, blog posts, conversations, social media shares resounded with “What! Me Too!”

Welcome to the Age of Aquarius! More and more of us are picking up on  truth vibrations and we are shifting from an epoque of control to the dawn of human expansion. It’s like we’re all in the same class as preparation for what is to come.

Energy Experience 1: The Millenial Generation has found itself in a new world unlike anything that humanity has ever experienced. Nothing makes sense, nothing is black and white. The past 3 years for billions of us young adults have been high pressure, confusing and anxiety-ridden.

Energy Experience 2: We felt ourselves being forced to realise we have to change our careers and exist in a transitioning earth where global systems are disintegrating before we can even find our feet. We just couldn’t seem to get our money, or, career choices right for a moment there.

Energy Experience 3: We’ve been under pressure to only live a life that fits our gifts, passions and personalities. In the past one could ignore their personal truth, or, calling and get on with fitting in with the status quo and safe. For the average Millenial, living outside of one’s truth causes a painful reaction in the energies and experiences around us. If you don’t follow the calling, or, live in your integrity, your ass gets kicked. And I mean black and blue!

Energy Experience 4: #ItsComplicated was the dominant “dating” theme in 2016. Hell was anyone dating at all? We are marrying even later than before and struggling to attract even a boyfriend. Frivolous frog kissing just isn’t cutting it with the Divine. For every Charlotte crying out “Where is He?” the Universe seems to force us into a time of solitude, spiritual evolution, knowledge acquisition, sexual enhancement, financial and career grooming from a spiritual perspective as well as forming a companionship with the Divine. Only once the process reaches a certain level does the true “Soul Mate” come in. In fact, we are under pressure to mate with our own souls and only then love comes in. Really ladies! Nothing less is acceptable to the Universe.

Ladies do share your 2016 experiences. I think we can all agree something great is at work here.



In this new world order, multidimensional black sisters are an anomaly most of society is trying to grapple with and accommodate. The girl who can twerk in a club one night and be a truly aligned spiritual sister simultaneously. The girl who can talk dirty with boys over a beer one minute and believe in God, marriage and family.

We’re assertive yet accommodating. Kind and merciful yet unable to suffer fools easily. We reside in a modern culture that abhors female vulnerability. Inside we’re little girls who are helpless romantics, yet, we can cut off a toxic relationship without a sign of mercy no matter how deeply we feel for someone.

Some of us are petrol-head black girls, dreaming of biking cross-country and owning a fleet of the coolest muscle cars on the planet. Sisters pray to Buddha, are curious about extraterrestrial existence and many think the “god-idea” is unfounded and beneath themselves.

We’re the brand new bi-product of today’s inner-space-exploration. The descendants of Oprah, The Secret, Sex and The City, Beyoncé, The Obamas and Keeping Up With The Kardashians.

Do not get it twisted, we’re in no way confused about who we are. We are fully aware of our imperfections, perfections and humanity. But, in no way lost. In fact you could not have found a more assertive and self aware generation of women.

She is you, she is God, She is we.

Cheers to the evolved black woman!



I was sent forth from the power, and I have come to those who reflect upon me, and I have been found among those who seek after me. Look upon me, you who reflect upon me, and you hearers, hear me. You who are waiting for me, take me to yourselves. And do not banish me from your sight. And do not make your voice hate me, nor your hearing. Do not be ignorant of me anywhere or any time.  Be on your guard! Do not be ignorant of me.

For I am the first and the last. I am the honoured one and the scorned one. I am the whore and the holy one. I am the wife and the virgin. I am

and the daughter. I am the members of my mother. I am the barren one and many are her sons. I am she whose wedding is great, and I have not taken a husband. I am the midwife and she who does not bear. I am the solace of my labour pains.

I am the bride and the bridegroom, and it is my husband who begot me. I am the mother of my father and the sister of my husband and he is my offspring. I am the slave of him who prepared me. I am the ruler of my offspring. But he is the one who begot me before the time on a birthday. And he is my offspring in (due) time, and my power is from him. I am the staff of his power in his youth,and he is the rod of my old age. And whatever he wills happens to me.

I am the silence that is incomprehensible and the idea whose remembrance is frequent. I am the voice whose sound is manifold and the word whose appearance is multiple. I am the utterance of my name. Why, you who hate me, do you love me, and hate those who love me? You who deny me, confess me, and you who confess me, deny me. You who tell the truth about me, lie about me, and you who have lied about me, tell the truth about me.

You who know me, be ignorant of me, and those who have not known me, let them know me. For I am knowledge and ignorance. I am shame and boldness. I am shameless; I am ashamed. I am strength and I am fear. I am war and peace. Give heed to me. I am the one who is disgraced and the great one. Give heed to my poverty and my wealth. Do not be arrogant to me when I am cast out upon the earth, and you will find me in those that are to come.

And do not look upon me on the dung-heap nor go and leave me cast out, and you will find me in the kingdoms. And do not look upon me when I am cast out among those who are disgraced and in the least places, nor laugh at me. And do not cast me out among those who are slain in violence. But I, I am compassionate and I am cruel.

Be on your guard! Do not hate my obedience and do not love my self-control.

In my weakness, do not forsake me, and do not be afraid of my power.

For why do you despise my fear and curse my pride?

But I am she who exists in all fears and strength in trembling.

I am she who is weak, and I am well in a pleasant place.

I am senseless and I am wise. Why have you hated me in your counsels?

For I shall be silent among those who are silent and I shall appear and speak.

Give heed to me.

‘The Thunder, Perfect Mind’ is a cryptic meditation poem written in the voice of a feminine divinity and discovered among the Gnostic Scriptures at Nag, Egypt in 1945.




Dear Women,

I hope this letter finds you well and you’re having a great start to your 2016.

Today I want to bring life changing enlightenment to you. Today I need you to stop seeing yourself as a mere human. As just a woman, or, female and / or the weaker sex who is always loosing in life and love. Change your perception of yourself and experiences and your life will evolve at a faster and more positive momentum than you could ever imagine.

I’m going to use an analogy that will make this comprehensible and also possibly change how you live and date.

Women complain about men who are out there refusing to commit to a relationship,  indulging in seemingly meaningless sex with whomever they please. But, I need you to really have a good look at what you’re actually observing here. God speaks to us in mysterious ways. Are these people being selfish? Absolutely! Are they being true to themselves, where they’re at and what they desire? Yes! Is that wrong? Be honest…Selah.

I have come to learn over the course of my spiritual journey that these are souls who have come into this time-space reality to teach women a profound spiritual law and truth, helping them regain the divine being-ness and the confidence they lost over the centuries.

Thus sayeth God, you and you alone are the powerful and deliberate co-creator of your reality. You are powerful creative vibrational energy. So my beautiful’vibrational-energy,’ in order to create a favourable reality, you must align with the divine source (God), live through that alignment and from there follow your truth and bliss. You will then vibrate and attract only that which is in your favour.

The aforementioned men, that society tends to judge and abhor, are merely souls brought here to loudly declare and demonstrate this powerful law. What an impactful job they’re doing! They are unapologetic, conscious architects of the life they desire. They choose to be true to one’s self, point blank and period. The majority of men, in general, have this incredible sense of self and remain loyal to that despite a woman’s incessant demand to acquiesce. They choose to calmly hold on to their hearts, vibrating at an aligned and intentional level. The universe conspires in their favour and time again and the result is they create and then cleave to a mate who fits that desire. So simple, fluid, clear and true.

With such strong conviction, self-connection and intention is it any wonder that for them, it is truly “a man’s world.” A reality which they vibrationally mould into whatever they want. A world in which society says “your wish is my command.” A world in which they’re surrounded by countless subservient women / souls who become the physical manifestation of such deliberate intent, clamouring to do whatever it takes to be the ‘chosen one.’

How powerful! How supernaturally extraordinary! It’s been right in front of our faces the whole damn time. You become and create what you believe, feel and just know. The law of alignment and attraction is demonstrated to us in all these nuances.

Ladies, instead of being a victim and indulging in negativity, don’t you want to use your energy to become mistress of your own universe.

So here’s the grace and love and beauty of this law…. the universe, or, reality is not at all limited to the intentions / creations of one group, or, person!

Life can be whatever you want it to be! In fact, it’s not a man’s world. It’s your world. What do you want? Our loving and gracious God really, truly has lovingly designed the cosmos to work in your favour. And He lavishly placed in your hands the free will to be and have and enjoy whatever you want or need. To be mistress of your destiny!

Stop self-sabotaging beloved because you feel it is a woman’s lot in life to never have what she wants. To struggle in love and career and society. We need to end that horrible belief and dialogue as a society. It’s been a nightmarish, fulfilled prophecy for far too long now. ENOUGH!

If you want true love, vibrate, believe and align with true love. Love is of God. God is love. If you’re not aligning with love, then it is simply an indicator that you darling daughter are not aligning with your God, your source. See?

God is love. So of course he wants to see love prevail! So, like your male counterparts, grow a pair, become your own boss. Get cocky and simply believe in it, become it and selfishly vibrate it. Dare to be arrogant enough to simply know that you are a girl, or, a woman who only brings into line that which she wants.

Divine beings, let’s co-create great relationships with likeminded men. Stop observing and talking about men we deem unlovable and wrong. They don’t exist in our time-space reality; therefore, we do not give them the time of day. If you encounter one, it’s an indicator you’re somehow out of whack in your vibration. Simply face what’s going on, do an internal recalibration, get back to source and move on in love. Be true north. Don’t get caught up in the pain and negative contrasts of life. Keep on joyfully aligning.

A “player’s” self-image, lifestyle, conversation, mind, conscience is geared around sex and sexual conquests. They obsess focus on and pursue sex. Therefore they attract and partake of as much of it as they want unapologetically. Ignore what you don’t want and incessantly talk about, be, pursue and indulge in what you do want. Bad men don’t exist. Aligned men who believe in and attract what they want, whether we think it’s wrong, do.

Choose to be mistress of your space and do life with the ones who are in line with what you want. Period!

Powerful Forgiveness & Empathy

Courtesy of OWN Network

Screw ‘You’ This 2016

Screw Me-1

Hello 2016! Thanks for the slap in my face today and reminding me of the greatest lessons I had to learn in 2015; it’s not all about me; patience is a virtue; love unconditionally; you were never a victim.

I’m a self-confessed bless-me, fix-me, prosperity junkie. I spend numerous hours fixating on what to fix about myself and what I need to achieve and acquire in order to manifest the grandiose life I envision for moi.

One never realizes that life is passing by, one’s awareness and perception of the world becomes stunted, one dimensional and you miss out on nuggets that could’ve been acquired from simply partaking of the colourful personalities and opinions and experiences around them. Most importantly you miss out on love and a life even more rich and amazing than what you have in mind.

When was the last time you did anything lavishly kind and loving for other people, for an entire week without drowning in concerns about you? I say kindness is next to Godliness. To stop, be still, simply observe the world and talk to people, and listen to them and lend a helping, or, loving hand.

Can you go a day without trying to fix something you feel is “wrong” about you? Can you go a day without trying to rectify a problem you see in your partner, whom you feel is inconveniencing the expectations / vision you had of the relationship in your head.

Can you go a day…let’s just start with a day… simply liking yourself and your loved ones, as and where you are, regardless of perceived imperfections? Can you love him today even if he hasn’t proposed, called, or, showered you with affection? Can you love your imperfect parents, who did the best they could with what they knew and had?

When did we start to believe that all there is to life is me? it’s narcissistic. I’m tired of me actually. I want to wake up and experience the world AS IT IS. No trying to change anything, or, anyone. To simply live, breath slowly, eat well and chill. I’m open to where I’m at now. The future has it’s own battles. I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

I’m open to who my mother, my father, my sibling, my God, my man, my friends, my society are.

Lighten up folks. The sun shines us all!

Not Just a Local, African Kid. I’m a Global Player

This TED Talk by Magatte Wade really speaks to my ambitions, the impact I’d like my legacy to have on humanity and how I’d like to go about fleshing it out.

I’m proud and blessed to have been born and bred in Africa. But, I feel in all honesty that Melissa Russell transcends merely being African. I am a global citizen and game player. I do not subscribe to premise that I’m this one dimensional idea of what it means to be African. I grew up in a world where borders have long since collapsed online and we’re all now a part of one global community and streaming consciousness.

I want to build an iconic brand that establishes me as a global conversationalist, problem solver and culture-caster. I’m not just a local kid. I’m a cool global player. I believe this personal brand and ideology can help me contribute in a culturally relevant, effective and popular manner towards advancing the world around me.



A-Cup Girl

Why do I feel most alive and strong when I take uncalculated, unbridled risks in my life.

Patience is not one of my virtues. And that typically translates into a desire to live a somewhat nomadic life. New adventures, new challenges and a pattern of waking up one morning of the 3rd year, throwing all caution down the crapper and just starting over.

As a little girl whenever we went on holiday I’d beg to not go back home. I can recall giving the folks a hug in the parking lot of my new campus digs, my first day of university. Before the car had turned the curb I’d excitedly dashed off to explore my new home while my mom waved at…no one standing there.

That’s my style of doing life I’m finding; fearless, loyal to love and life. You know, I somehow know…just know that it’ll catch me if I jump. It’s trying to collide with me. The life I desire. I’m not afraid she won’t find me. I just know who I am to become is meant to be.

Someone is inside me dying to exist and every night she nudges at me. She doesn’t give a flying F&^% about saving face!

I’m no Martha Stewart. No administration goddess. I’m a dreamer, headed for a life of significance and yet, so human and flawed in a mundane everyday way. I’m embracing my humanity, simplicity and free spirit. I’m an A-cup, skinny powerhouse and I love it!

Take me as I am! It’s all you’ll get.


If I could be me for a day

If I could be me for a dayIf I could be me for a day…

Come Alive Girl! No one wants to be a Necrophiliac!

It’s a gorgeous warm summer’s night here in Joburg. I just got home from a divine candle lit dinner with a girlfriend. My belly’s full, candles are lit and I can hear the rain pelting down outside.

So, I’ve come to a conclusion in my life. The universe definitely isn’t ready for me to be in a relationship yet, let alone allow any of these local boys in. And the big reason is my calling / career.

Ok, let me back track and breakdown how I got to this conclusion.

I asked my girlfriend to be brutal and tell me what truly happened to repel “Mr. Punk Ass Bitch” from going all the way in asking me out over our weekend break. “Well girl” she said “the guys always thought you were the serious focused type. They were used to seeing you at work running around, planning events, making things happen and being in your work mode. But, then we had the long weekend away and suddenly you were sexy, happy and laughing. It’s a bit off a mind-fuck trying to gauge exactly who you are.”

The honest truth of what transpired that weekend was that he had confided in my closest male friend about his attraction to me and asked if he had the go-ahead to make a move on me. But, we attended a a festival that day, I’d asked a girl I knew to join our group, she caught his attention and he pursued her instead. They’re keeping in touch to this day.

Now, if you want to talk about someone who appears serious…and is actually quite the elegant lady…it’s definitely her. “Yes. But you see,” my friend went on to explain “at first he had dismissed this girl, but, after talking to her he felt she was super chilled, cool and the conversation was light and fun.”
Well, naturally I was confused. I don’t get it. She was super quiet and serious for most of the evening. But, this one, he felt the need to give a chance? I was mature, relaxed, open, goofy, mingling with the group and STILL get thrown into the “serious girl” dungeon of loneliness. NOT FAIR!

Well, here’s another perspective on the whole thing.

Perhaps it’s not the level of conservatism, nor the fun-loving attitude one possessed that determine who got the man. Perhaps what he and many others picked up on, and failed to articulate, was that they had simply sensed the heaviness of my ongoing journey to find and start my life’s work. They could sense I was someone whose mind and heart wasn’t really in the “game” to play. I haven’t been one who is fully at the “party,” but, rather a guest who was there only briefly and existed early to attend to unfinished business.

The honest truth is my life is up in the air at the moment. I thought I’d finally arrived at my dream and life’s ambition, but, actually I’ve only arrived at a crossroad and it’s a matter of life or death.

I need to come to the genesis of my life’s work!

I’ve had a dream and knowing of exactly who and what I was mean to be my whole life. I know this sounds naïve, but, I’ve always known EXACTLY what I was meant to do and whom I am meant to be. I just never had the balls to pursue “me.” The universe right now is kicking my ass and forcing me to face this major disparity in my life. Melissa has to face the music and the truth, or, life won’t let me have anything else until I say “uncle” and get on with the show.

I’ve known for a fact I’ll never be able to cope with being alive unless I fulfill this one thing. God knows that for me my purpose will determine everything else in other areas of my life.

So with all this chaos, push-and-pull and the great call all round me, do you think another soul would dare walk into such crowded space! When they say I’m too serious, what they mean is…“I get the feeling this one is hectically preoccupied right now, so I’ll just move on to the next while she finishes what ever is on her heart and mind.

So, that’s what I’ll do. Finish off what’s on my mind and heart. For now, my “busy right now” energy will continue to repel other beings (potential suitors) until I’m in the right place. It’s so annoying because this dream has been aching in me MY WHOLE LIFE; from when I can recall my childhood. I simply just know.

My personality, sense of style and demeanor are going through some pretty drastic metamorphosis, much to everyone’s dismay. I’m beginning to switch into “her.” The girl I knew I was mean to be. I don’t even think Melissa Russell exists anymore. I actually and very seriously think she’s literally dead and I’ve been filling new wine in old skin, to no avail.

Hey…No one wants to be a Necrophiliac!


By Caroline McHugh, TEDx Milton Keynes Women


Its 01h30, my first early night in and I couldn’t sleep! C’est la vie.

So, I’ve been getting nothing but positive responses on my “No Punk Ass Bitches Allowed” article. Thank you gals!

But, I would like to reiterate that my intent was not on male bashing, it was merely an outlet and sharing of my experience. It was my arrival at an “ah ha!”

I’ve come to really disdain all the anti-male propaganda that society has come to accept as ultimate truth. And it’s just wreaked so much havoc in my experience with men. You know, “all men are dogs;” “Men can’t be trusted at all. They are the demise of humanity, marriage and love.”

Well I call bullshit on the whole thing! If anything this has done nothing, but, big-upped the bad apples of the pack, and drawn attention away from the great loving men who are going above and beyond in their relationships, as fathers and leaders of our communities.

I believe in the power of the subconscious mind and the power of the tongue. The more we spread and believe in this mess the more of it we‘re manifesting as a society. And unfortunately, like so many women out there, I was collateral damage to that negative materialisation.

At the end of the day, no one is perfect ya’ll. And ladies, let’s not dare pretend that we’re any more superior and put together than our men. Start to believe that men are human too. Their just as entitled to their daddy / mommy issues as we are. Learn to see the brokenness for what it is, be honest with yourself about what it is that’s right in front of you and deal with it accordingly.

Here’s my proposition to you. And I’m going to be working on this myself. Why don’t we stop giving attention to the “bad boy” and start speaking of the good one. If a man is exhibiting negative, detrimental behaviour, believe it for what it is and walk away in love. Please, please believe in these words “If someone shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM.”

I believe everything is energy and that the existence or happenstance you live today didn’t come to be just by default. You made it thus. Your beliefs and words, put out into the universe, made it thus.

Growing up as a child I experienced a traumatic disappointment that shaped my view of love and men. Now, I wanted the fairy-tale romance and always knew the kind of traits my husband would have. I had envisioned the adventurous life we’d live and the incredible feats we’d accomplish as a team, with the kids. I truly believe couples are united for a divine purpose. However, I had a chronically negative belief that all men hate love, detest companionship and they just can’t stand being with someone they can build an awesome life with; that they ultimately want vapid, subservient bombshells.

So, multiply that by 19 years of (24/7) repeating the same narrative over and over again. It was what I discussed with friends. What the women around me constantly expressed. What the media incessantly transmitted. Oh and then there was the belief that ultimately it was up to the woman to “fix” this problem. So, here’s “50 ways to make him stay” “100 ways to blow his mind.”

On and on and on it went!

The result…I continuously manifested and encountered the same broken masculine soul who embodied all this trash. He came to me in various forms. But, it was him all the same. At school, in church and at work. And all because we’re incessantly calling upon and spooked by the minority who hurt because their hurting.

This is not a healthy way for me to exist. And I choose to not be a part of it anymore.

Dear bad boy, you are what you are. But, that’s on you my brother. I wish you healing, dreams, justice and love in abundance. But, I’m choosing to not dedicate my peace, health and joy to you anymore. I’m choosing to reside in the love of God, good men, my soul mate, my family and my babies. I’m choosing to focus on the glass as half full. I’m choosing to finally cooperate with a universe that is constantly trying to conspire in my favour.

Good bye and thanks for being the catalyst that has finally brought me into my own.

Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honourable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [centre your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].

-Philippians 4:8


Each and every component that makes up your life experience is drawn to you by the powerful Law of Attraction’s response to the thoughts you think and the story you tell about your life. Your money and financial assets; your body’s state of wellness, clarity, flexibility, size, and shape; your work environment, how you are treated, work satisfaction, and rewards—indeed, the very happiness of your life experience in general—is all happening because of the story that you tell. If you will let your dominant intention be to revise and improve the content of the story you tell every day of your life, it is our absolute promise to you that your life will become that ever-

improving story. For by the powerful Law of Attraction, it must be!

– Esther Hicks

Tauras Transition

My life as I know it is officially dead and gone.

July 07, 2015

“Time for a transition? Today, the quarter moon in your twelfth house of closure could find you ready to let something go. Maybe you had a few epiphanies over the past week, and you’ve been able to look at things from a wide-angle view. Perhaps you’ve finally embraced the truth of a situation, and you’ve been letting that settle in. Now, it’s time to process the heavier emotions that may have come with that. If you had a creative breakthrough, use the day to clear space in your life and schedule to take your next big leap.”

Taurus Daily Horoscope, elle.com